How I’m interviewing the world’s most successful people — and how an MTV star gave me my big break

Maybe our grandest dreams are meant for us

When Rob Dyrdek had me on his podcast — click here to play [I come on around 9min mark]

For multiple years, I had felt stuck in my professional life.

I knew that I needed to move on from the web design business that I had been running, as it truly did not excite me anymore.

I had pigeon-holed myself into a business that I no longer enjoyed; I had created a “job” for myself with no opportunity for growth.

I was taking on the risk of an “entrepreneur” with none of the upside. This is a common yet often-unrealized trap, explained by books like The E-Myth.

2021 became a year of immense crisis for me, catalyzed by an unexpected breakup near the end of March 2021.

While the breakup itself was painful, the wounds it exposed were far more unbearable:

• “Is there something wrong with me?”
• “Am I not enough?”
• “I know I’m capable of great things, so why do I fall short every single time? Could I be delusional in believing my own abilities?”
• “Did I make a mistake by not doing xyz? Are others’ critiques right about me?”

(If you’re interested in the details and thought process of this crisis further, see my Medium post here).

Step 1: Self-reflection

I spent the next six months in a state of agony and painful confusion. HOW has it not ‘worked out’ yet for me in some way? Am I not who I think I am?

Is it possible that what I truly want deep-down (and am destined for) is far different than what I’ve outwardly declared that I’ve wanted for so long?

Finding the right work is critical for me because I know that my deepest purpose in this world is work-related. I have a calling of sorts, but damn has it felt elusive.

My guiding question of that period was:

What would I work on, solely for the joy of it? That no matter the outcome, I would have no regrets, knowing that I would have at least enjoyed the work and found the pursuit worthwhile?

In December 2021, the idea came to me:

I would write a book where I curate the laws of the universe (irrespective of religion) by interviewing some of the world’s most all-around successful and well-regarded people on their deepest existential beliefs.

Comparable to a more modern-day and actionable Think & Grow Rich.

Why write this book?

• I am fascinated by the intersection success and spirituality/a deeper calling.
• I have read hundreds of books on these topics, but clearly, I still haven’t figured it out. There are definitely others in the same boat as me.
• Maybe by going directly to my heroes, I could get the answers that I’ve been so desperately seeking once-and-for all — and distribute those to the masses inexpensively as a book.

Step 2: Creating a vision and a plan

I started to write down and solidify my vision in a Notion document. I wasn’t even yet clear that it would be a book. In fact, my first inclination was that this would be an in-person video interview series.

In the vision doc, I covered:

• Possible titles
• My dream interviewees — based on my very specific set of criteria (it is not just because they are rich or famous)
• The why behind the book — and why not
• Why I’m the guy to bring this into existence

There is no shortage of personal development content on the internet. I would say there’s an overabundance of it from all of the lackluster content.

But I knew that I could interview my heroes in a way that was far deeper and more profound than they have ever been interviewed before.

So who would I ask to interview first?

Step 3: Follow my instinct and send a cold email that frightened me

Some of you may know of Rob Dyrdek from his numerous shows on MTV (including Ridiculousness, which is currently on TV — sometimes for hours per day). Many people don’t realize that he’s now a wildly-successful entrepreneur with a fascinating life philosophy.

After watching Rob on the popular podcast Impact Theory (embedded below), I had a deep inner knowing that Rob would be my first book interviewee.

With this insight, what did I do next?

I crafted the most heartfelt and detailed cold-email that I could muster, which included the link to my vision doc in Notion, where I had also embedded a short video of myself using a tool called Loom.

I still remember the feeling of sweat dripping down my arm as I hit the send button on that that first email.

A lot of the conventional wisdom says “These are busy people — make your email short and to-the-point!”

I hate that emotionless and transactional approach.

While I did not receive a response on the first email, but when one week passed, I sent a polite and very quick follow-up second email.

He immediately replied to the quick follow-up email, asking me if I wanted to discuss the idea on his popular podcast, Build With Rob (click here to watch— I come on around the 9-minute mark).

Step 4: Be ready to agree to show up when the big opportunity arises to validate your dreams

I was stunned. I hadn’t planned for this! He was going to interview me? I’ve never been on a live episode of anything! This book that I think I wanted to write would now be out there for everyone to see!

I still had no furniture in my apartment (having just moved to Austin), my laptop webcam sucks, and my external microphone wasn’t working, and who knows if I’d say something that I’d regret?!?

But when all was said and done…I pulled it off.

Rob’s advice on our podcast episode was wildly clear and validating. I came back to him with the preparation he requested (a clearer vision doc and the specific well-researched questions that I would ask him), and we had a killer interview for the book.

He was even generous enough to provide me with additional feedback/guidance over separate Zoom meetings, which were unbelievably helpful.

Someone I deeply respect offered me more time than I asked in, solely to try to help me succeed?!

It was immensely impactful and validating. I’d never before had someone at this echelon of success indicate this level of belief in me / my pursuits.

One of the bits of wisdom that he shared during our conversation:

“Belief is not faith. Belief is when you know at your core that ‘it can happen.’ Because when you know something is going to work, it’s easy to stay motivated to keep doing it; you just have to keep going…

You build belief by creating clear goals and having clear milestones and progression towards those clear goals.”

I had the idea of self-belief all backwards.

I thought in order to be successful, one had to begin with an iron-clad belief in themselves and their pursuit. After all, that’s what all of the entrepreneurial media stories seem to emphasize.

I couldn’t figure out how to instill that into myself. It was a chicken-or-the-egg problem. If air-tight belief in myself was needed for massive success, if I haven’t had massive success before, how could I have that belief?

I did not understand that belief is a progression. I did not realize that I could have belief in something just because it ‘could’ happen.

Perhaps I didn’t give myself permission to believe in something that I didn’t yet have tangible proof of. My standards of belief were too perfectionistic and/or pessimistic.

Step 5: Waging War against “Unworthiness”

My north star in 2022 was to move towards expansion. I was deeply aware of how small I was playing for years with my web design business.

So why could I not seem to break out to the next level?!

On this topic, I recommend The Big Leap by Gay Hendricks, where he outlines the four hidden barriers of the “The Upper Limit Problem.”

While I could relate to three of the four barriers, this one was the big one:

Hidden Barrier #4 — The Crime of Outshining: The unconscious mantra of the outshining barrier goes like this: I must not expand to my full success, because if I did I would outshine [name] and make him or her look or feel bad.

I love my family and I’m grateful for them. But nobody in my family has truly ever really ‘shined’ or done something wildly daring.

But here I am, wanting to publish a book of the deepest and most vulnerable views ever done with the likes of Oprah and Steph Curry.

Who am I to shine? Chasing my dreams is for others, not for me.

One of the other remarkable interviewees in my book is Suzy Batiz, founder of Poo Pourri — and one of the wealthiest self-made women in America (and one of my heroes).

Here’s what she told me when I asked her about how to overcome unworthiness:

“You look at any indigenous community of people: that’s not even a concept. They don’t say they’re not worthy of the deer that they caught today, or the air that they’re breathing, or the sun that they have, or the plants that are growing.

It’s a Western mind-fuck.”

Much of the world is in a collective crisis of worthiness.

Many of us hold a lot of trauma and limiting beliefs whether we realize it or not.

I believe that much of it is passed down throughout generations. It didn’t start with us, but it is part of our duty in this life to alchemize it.

Not to mention that the majority of us have been infected with the delusion of thinking that life is zero-sum (“If I win, someone has to lose”) rather than an infinite game (“Everyone can win / there is more than enough for everyone).

“Who am I to shine? I’m not that special.”

“Who am I to have money, when so many people are poor?”

It’s the same reason why it’s hard to share and celebrate our wins with others. We might fear appearing as if we’re bragging or might make others jealous.

Step 6: Craft a personal mental framework that helps you re-justify going for your dreams

I believe that we are each innately wired with a purpose on this earth, along with the gifts to actualize them (and as we take steps, we will attract additional people and resources along the way).

We all are born with the innate capacity and worthiness to shine brightly and have an abundance of resources.

In my interview with Suzy, she explains that the laws of physics themselves support + justify our desires:

• One of Suzy’s core concepts is that ideas themselves are alive.
• And that everything is seeking more life-force energy.
• Ideas are only drawn to a “resonant” host.
• Therefore if you could not pull off the idea, it would have never come to you (based on the laws of physics and energetic resonance).

Not only are we innately wired with our dreams and the gifts to actualize them, but the laws of physics themselves step in to support us.

Step 7: Being open to continued assistance and asking for help [including from the readers of this post!]

As I’ve continued down this route, I’ve been very pleasantly surprised with the super-legit authors and thought leaders that have replied to my cold emails, where I would say:

• What I’m working on
• Link to a private sample draft chapter
• At the end ask “Do you know anyone that can accelerate my progress?” [And welcome any feedback if they read the sample chapter]

To be clear — I wrote this post with the intention of providing value and joy to readers.

Yet if anyone has connections of any kind to the following people (and feels the desire to assist me), please reach out to me here; I would be infinitely grateful!

• Any super-successful book agents, publishers, or thought leaders in the book space
• Oprah, Steph Curry, Beyoncé, Jay-Z, Sara Blakely, Jesse Itzler, and Ed Mylett

Possible action items / reflection questions for readers:

• “What would be a great way to use my gifts — if I could do ANYTHING for the mere joy of it [knowing that money is already taken care of]…without worrying about an outcome or being judged…what would that be?” Perhaps there’s an idea that sends tingles up your arm or you can’t get out of your head?
• Pretend you’re a lawyer and you HAVE to make a case to yourself for pursuing this new (and possibly scary/vulnerable) endeavor. Take inventory: what are the gifts/skills that you have at your disposal? Specific experiences that have trained you (which can include your most painful moments)? Previous examples of related successes — even if they’re small? Are there certain people in your network that can help you — or people that you feel comfortable enough around to ask if they know anyone?
• What is a small and actionable next step that you can take to genuinely move the ball forward on it (e.g. start a vision doc)? Ideally moving the ball forward CONSISTENTLY, say for 30 minutes per day, so the momentum can stack up?
• WHO can help you and how? Or who are people that you admire that you wish knew about your pursuit — and informing them, just in case they would really like to know? Reach out and ask, because people naturally want to help like-minded people and endeavors that they find worthy.

Thank you very much for reading!

If you enjoyed this story, claps / follows / subscribes are super helpful and appreciated!

And if you have any feedback that you’d like to share, please comment.

Additional links and ways to engage with me:

• Here’s the link to my book, for those that wish to follow along.
• I’m also playing around with my own podcast. Also aiming to get into YouTube shortly.
• Have ideas for ways we could work together or just want to say hi? I’d love to hear from you — contact me here!
• Please follow me here on Medium (or subscribe to my Substack so you can receive posts right in your inbox!).